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Betrayed

6 Oct

(to be read with a beat)

You may not attain me,
contain me, save me

Don’t bless me, lecture me
waste it on me.

Your words—a sieve
peeling my flesh,

You: like wind
diminished
by death.

Cruel, pompous
rigid like steel
You—I despise
Your schtick
Your spiel

Once inspired,
now live wired

belittled, battered
shapeless and tired

Form—post-mortem.
rotten—gross
you talk
such boredom!

You, my morgue of God’s great splendor
carry no more
my divided nature.
A murderer of vision,
how did I not see?
the one who killed me, not you—but me.

The Widow’s Lament

5 Oct

Where are you beyond the grave?
Where have you gone?
Can you not hear my cries?
Has your  soul become deaf?

Gone and in despair I am—without you.
My life gone, all that I knew.
Changed forever—my world
No longer you.

How black the soul becomes
when pain so deep
curdles upon life’s shelf.
I see no light—but sadness
Where your heart used to be.

I press my lips to your ground,
your soil and your weeds.
I caress your square of earth
of which you will forever occupy.

For it is the only thing I have left of you.
It is my only breath.
A widow’s heart can never be healed,
when it’s half is buried beneath the dirt.

Maze

3 Oct

1.

You come to find me in the lost time of our souls. You forgot me there. I’m sitting in the dark now, waiting for you to find me. You are lost and you cannot find your way. You have found the maze. You are distorted and lost. You will not find me.

2.
My heart bleeds because of you. My stones blood stained and warm. I am savage and slashed inside. My mind is lost and it is not right. I am crazy now. I have been lost too long. I am not the same woman. You must not find me now.

3.
I am cold but my heart still bleeds hot blood on the earthen floor. My toes dirty from travel. My skin hard and tough. I have lost my softness. Life has been hard on me, and you have not been there to see it. You have been lost too long.

4.
I have lost much of me. I look behind us and I see pieces of me stranded like pebbles on a beach. I am gaping wide and cannot hold myself in any longer. I am falling out all over the place. I must be kept better.

5.
I must try now to gather myself up and become whole again. Please stay away from me.

6.
The spirit Gods have found me now. Their chants I hear deep inside my mind. I can only hear their words. I must follow them. Their chant heals my wounds.

7.
You must listen to my warrior words. I cannot stand your harm any longer. I have become a shield, crystal blue and bright. My laughter is its charm. I am stronger now. And I listen. It will not be the same. Change is God’s free gift. We have only to accept it.

Change is the gift that frees what binds us.